the thing is, sometimes you need other people to read your work

Here's the thing about sharing your writing: It's scary. It's exciting. It can make or break your writing future in five minutes flat.

Because a good reader isn't necessarily a good critique-giver. A friend or family member may or may not be any better than a stranger. A kind word from a reader you don't know could make the difference between you giving up and you finishing your damned novel. A harsh word could keep you from writing ever again.

Not everyone writes for other people, and that's totally fine. I do write for other people, though, so even though I always write for myself first, I write with the intention that someday someone else will read (and hopefully enjoy) what I've written.

Sharing your writing is hard because it shows you're both fragile and strong at the same time. You have to be capable of both receiving criticism and ignoring it, depending on whether or not it's worthwhile. You're basically ripping out your heart, putting it on a plate with some nice garnish, and saying, Here, tell me what you think.

You have to be sure you really want to know what the other person thinks.

I've been working on my fairy tale for nine years now, which is completely ridiculous and has more to do with my gift for avoidance than with any real need to be focusing on the project this long. I've shared various drafts with people who've loved it, people who've been bored by it, people who've identified with the characters, and people who've felt frustrated and annoyed by them. Reading it myself, I've both loved and hated it. Some scenes feel just right; others feel lacking in some way I can't really define.

Horatio isn't easy to write. He doesn't quip brilliantly like Julien or exude snarky disaffected teenager like Adrienne. I understand his situation more than I really understand him.

Reading through a critique today, I finally got called out on that. Who is Horatio, and why should the reader care what happens to him? It was a bit like getting slap in the face (all that work and it's still not quite right?)...but a good one. I can finally explain what it is about my drafts that hasn't felt right: I still don't really know who Horatio is.

Is it possible to be both cautiously optimistic and severely depressed at the same time?